it amazes me how i can actually complete my revisions without having to crack my brain and reminisce those tiny important details taught during lecture. maybe its because i'm more relaxed with less than 3mths of diploma life left. yes, just 15 weeks left before i can finally walk proudly out of Baruch College with a diploma cert in hand. and now i'm wishing time can move along faster. hahas, but its kinda sad to know i'm reaching the point in my life where everything has to get serious. what-the-heck! i've still not enjoyed my carefree days(!!!)

reputation and happiness, each at either end of the weighing scale. and both being of the same weight; unable to weighten the more important factor in my life. it is either i chase after those 'papers' and get myself deprived of happiness OR i relax and fall back into pace with normal teens my age and burn those early 'paper' dreams. get my point?

well, to me, i rather give up on building a good reputation. i have so many different reputation that people will ask, "which ilma are u talking abt?" kinda confusing, if u ask me. oke, enuf abt my forever-never-ending dilemma. lets move on...

so, a week back(?), i read a friend's blog and she imposed this question that really set me thinking for nights...

"if there is a discovery of the elixir, will u want to live forever?"

without pausing for a second to think, a 'yes' popped into my head. well, i can't deny that, yes, i'm afraid of death. who isn't, right? but after spending some real good time pondering on each factor involved for making a decision, i realise, NO, i don't want to live forever. who wants to live in this condition-getting-worst world without their loVed ones? and i want to be spared the pain of living through the dismiss of my loVes. plus, its so tiring to keep updating yourself on the new advances.

all i want is to finish what i started; i want all my unfinished business to end and getting to live life to the fullest before dying. i want everything around me to be prosper and proper before i leave. afterall, i want to rest in peace not pieces. and haven't u heard these phrases(?)...

"It’s the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more."

"to the well-organised mind, death is but the next great adventure"

now, what is your answer to that question imposed? have fun searching yourself peeps =)

I am Ilma. It means Knowledge.
I'm not your girl next door. I'm unique. I am ME.

It is best to remain silent and let one think you're a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubts.

[Afrah Cuzzie] [Ain] [Amalya] [Atiqah] [Darren] [Dawn Wayang] [Dirah] [Eera] [Fana] [Fylzah] [Haruda] [Husayn] [Lee Keat] [Mustaqim] [Nadia] [Nasyita] [Saadiqa] [Samantha] [Shahnaz] [ShaSha] [Simin] [Syafirah] [Syatira] [Uma] [Valerie] [Valerie] [Xiaxue]

May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 December 2009 February 2012

yeah, still kicking ass